MICH is hosting the Indiana Hoosiers this weekend for the start of their B10 conference matchups. What a better way to celebrate by having 11 tailgating essentials related to all 11 Big Ten teams!
Illinois: ICE --- The fighting Illini bring literally nothing to the conference this year. I’m not even sure they won a game yet. For that, they can be ICE. It keeps your beverage cold and when you run out of napkins, you clean the shit off your hands with it.
Indiana: Cheese Puffs: --- Sure their 3-0 rolling into A2 this weekend, but when the pressure is on, they crack and crumble into a worthless powder. Regardless of that, we still enjoy them even though they give you orange finger tips. How does that relate? Don’t ask.
Iowa: CORN: --- Grilled corn is always good. It’s cheap and easy to execute. Iowa, as we all know, is in the middle of a giant corn field. They sell Cola and Corn Cob Combos at Kinnick Stadium, so why not load up on their cheap produce and butter it up for some Crosschips.
Michigan: The Grill: --- It may have been low on propane last year, but in 2009 we loaded up at the Home Depot down south. It takes any Crosschips product or opponent and cooks the shit out of them with burning speed. The #1 essential item to a quality Crosschips tailgate.
Michigan State: CHIPS: --- Everyone likes chips and we all sure as hell like that M$U lost to the CHIPS (Central MICH) this year. We all stand around the tailgate, saying CHIPS and LOL’ing at their expense. Oh poor Sparty. HA.
Minnesota: Donuts: --- Our fat gophers to the north have long winters and to keep warm they pack on the pounds with these delectable breakfast treats. Let’s join them as we crack a beer at 7am.
Northwestern: Designated Driver: --- These Wildcats are smart. So smart in fact that it’s a good idea to befriend a few to tailgate with. They will not drink and then drive you home in your drunken state. The key is to pound a few earlier so they are obligated to be the DD. Love those smart kids.
Ohio State: BEER: --- As much as we hate these $UCKEYE$, they sure as hell can drink beer. For the past few years, they have been the guy no body can out-drink in the conference. Beer is obviously key to the tailgate and you better bring a lot of them to drown out your sorrows of the always possible loss to some cupcake of a program.
Penn State: Burgers & Dogs: --- Always good, but sometimes one may be a little under or over cooked, leaving a bad taste in your mouth. It’s always best when you cook them at home, because MICH has won the last 5 games at home since 1997.
Purdue: Whisky: --- Nothing starts off a tailgate like a good Boilermaker and Purdue has been known to “BOILER UP!” as the Boilermakers. When Purdue comes to town, it’s always a good time. MICH hasn’t lost to Purdon’t at home since 1965.
Wisconsin: Cheese & Crackers: --- We all know the state of Wisconsin is making cheese hand over fist, no idea what that means, but they have shit tons of cheese up there. Cheese may be “elegant” or “fancy” as some MICH tailgating jokes go, but you can’t go wrong with this finger food. Just don’t eat it while you drink a glass of White Zin, we arn’t at a Stanford tailgate Crosschippers.
So enjoy your Saturday Crosschippers!!!!!!!!!! LET’S GO BLUE!!!
don’t forget to post-tailgate!!!!
